Messin' with Scammers

I remember the first time I came into contact with one of those Nigerian scams. I was barely 18 and got this desperate email from a man trapped as a refuge somewhere foreign. Of all the people on earth, he was only able to email me for help and he happened to have millions. He was willing to share if I had him transfer funds into my bank account. I read it, got cold all over and called my Dad. Looking back, I can't believe how naive I was to even believe that this situation was real. The funny part was that I didn't want his money, I just wanted to help him out.

I'd like to think that I've gotten a little wiser since then but wouldn't you know it, every once in a while I come into contact with one of these scams. Some popular ones involve sending people fraudulent checks for big ticket items like jewelery, expensive clothing, etc. They find you through ads posted on sites like craiglist. I decided to list my wedding dress the other day to see if it would get any offers. I got a normal email asking for more details. I answered the questions the emailer had and then received a reply. Names and email address have been cropped out of these images to protect the innocent and the not so innocent:



I thought (to put my own spin on a classic), "We meet again scammers, at last. The circle is now complete. When I met you I was but the learner. Now, I am the master." So, I thought I'd just sent a quick reply to get rid of them:



I expected that to be the end of it. However, the economy must be hitting the scamming business hard too because the persistent guy wouldn't just let it be:



The only thing worse than a scammer is a pushy scammer. The only thing below that is a scammer with poor grammar. He asked for it. He practically begged for this:



Yes, when pushed to it, I can be a jerk...but at least I'm a jerk with a sense of humor.